There’s another way — a third door you can’t see from inside the choice you were handed.
Roots
The idea for this community came on its own, as an answer to one question: why are the situations so different, yet the resolutions so alike?
Why do 1:1s with colleagues at work come down not to mastering the next soft or hard skill more efficiently, but to: what is this person even doing here?
Why does the fear of pushing back on a manager’s or colleague’s blatant pressure or manipulation lead, drop by drop, to revulsion — until work that once lit you up “suddenly” becomes something you hate, and you can’t get up in the morning?
Why does the same thing happen at home? In a shop. At the office where you need to get a form.
At the hospital, fighting for your right to be heard and treated, instead of brushed off?
A whole set of beliefs and traumas for therapy to unpack — showing up as this: we stay silent when we should speak, we give up and walk away while the body screams why should I be the one to leave, while the aggressor stays, smirking? Hundreds of questions we live through every day.
Searching for my own answers, I came to this: at the core is an inner conviction that when I trust my intuition, it doesn’t let me down, and the feeling that “something’s off” rests on real ground. Living inside our social and cultural environment, we get used to imposed “norms” and patterns of behaviour.
The rebellion against “them,” the ones who cause the “pain,” turned inward — toward the one being hurt: the tender part of yourself that has been asking for help for years, longing to be seen and heard. This living part of us looks for a chance to say “I don’t want it this way,” and only step by step do we let ourselves believe — there’s another way. And from there we come back to “those who hurt, and are hurt by others,” hiding behind masks.
And now we come to what was drummed into us for years — something’s wrong with me, I’m not good enough, I can’t speak up, just a little more and I’ll manage. We come to see that a lie is hidden in this version of reality — and, in sheer terror, we say no for the first time, stepping into open conflict. And we feel such a rush from having acted the way we felt inside. In agreement with ourselves.
Life flows through us — different people, circumstances, and events appear in it. Some come into our lives for a moment, some for many years. This too shall pass — the question is what we ourselves hold on to. What in us clings to pain and won’t let it go? What helps us not lower our eyes before hardship?
The “harder” a situation seems, the more painful the circumstances, the more we snap at anyone who says it’ll be okay — they don’t hear me; what does he know about my problem? This state of separation destroys us from within.
Why such a long intro? I’m deliberately stepping into vulnerability — it genuinely scares me to come out and say publicly how I see this world. And I know there are people it will resonate with.
The “Open the Third Door” Manifesto
The moment you follow someone, you stop following the truth. — Jiddu Krishnamurti (speech dissolving the Order of the Star, 1929)
Leadership of your own life begins with simple things:
- Stop waiting for someone big and "respected" to decide for me.
- With the certainty that I'm "okay" as I am.
- With giving myself permission to live differently — in agreement with myself, to learn to feel the "inner compass" and act in line with it.
- Accepting the fear that people may come and belittle me, that it might not work out, yet choosing to go and try, to look for those it feels great to walk through life beside, and not settling for those around whom you shrink.
Come to work on yourself, not to watch.
Come to help those who are ready to change themselves and become the leader of their own life.
If you're standing before two choices, two doors, and feel that neither is yours, while "urgency" presses choose right now or else..., anxiety spikes and sinks deep inside — breathe out, and remember: there's another way. There is a third door.
Who this is for
For people who work with people, on both sides of the table:
- Those who lead — founders, owners, managers — who feel the team isn’t moving, or isn’t with them.
- Those who are led — specialists in the office or the company, remote workers — who do everything right and still go unnoticed or feel stuck.
For people who deal with people:
- Those who are approached to resolve a problem.
- Those who come — with requests, as clients, with complaints.
And it’s a gathering of people tired of pretending and bending to others’ expectations — who sincerely look for answers and do the work on themselves.
How it goes
We work through real situations from participants who are ready to share them.
We practice in a safe environment, in pairs and small groups, rehearsing conflictual, emotionally difficult situations.
Every meeting is a chance to see a new facet of yourself — where you betray yourself, where you take things on faith and pay for it later. And right there, a live rehearsal: a space to try on, without fear, a braver version of yourself — the one who isn’t afraid to say no, who spots manipulation and calmly shuts it down.
The format is roughly 30% talk, 70% practice: a short idea, work in pairs and small groups, and live breakdowns of real situations on the chair. You watch someone else’s breakdown and take from it exactly what fits your own life.
What we value
- Honesty over comfort. We’d rather tell you the truth, kindly, than keep things pleasant.
- Vulnerability — you go as deep as you choose to go.
- Psychological safety — non-negotiable. What’s said in the room stays in the room.
- Action over insight-collecting — we close every breakdown with something you actually do.
- Your own pace, your own path — this is an invitation to walk alongside, not to follow anyone.
What we practice
Two things we ask of each other in the room:
- You’re responsible for the move, not the outcome. You take the step; you don’t control how it lands. Old wisdom, still true: you have a right to your actions, never to their fruits (Bhagavad Gita 2.47). Make the move, release the result — that’s where the weight comes off.
- Leave your expectations at the door. Come without a verdict on how the evening should go, or who anyone should become — including yourself. The work goes deepest when no one is gripping the result.
What this is not
Not a lecture series. Not therapy. Not a guru with followers. No one here will hand you the Answer — but you might find your own Question.
The core
This is a community where I’m calling you to leadership. Leadership of your own life.
To honesty with yourself. To accepting your own vulnerability — and to stop hiding it, even from yourself.
I start with me. I’m not perfect, and I get things wrong. More than that — my whole path is made of mistakes, some of which still sting with shame. I’m not telling you this so you’ll admire my courage, but to lower the bar: if I can do this, so can you. You don’t have to arrive polished here. You have to arrive real.